kaluga park
Monday, February 6, 2012
Vasa turns 4!
Wow! He is now 4! I felt this ultimate pressure, at first, that he needed to have it all figured out because he is now the old age of 4. But, I'm trying to relax and be "cool" with the fact that it is o.k. that he still acts like a preschooler and not a responsible child :). He had a good time at his party. For months, he has asked when it would be his birthday--he has seen his sister and his cousin have their parties. So it was sweet to see him have the chance to blow his candles out and open his presents. What is too funny now is he insists that many, many things around here he got for his birthday. We'll watch a Barney video--vasa will say, "I got that for my birthday." No, not that--we've had that. He will put on clothes--Vasa will say, "I got this for my birthday." No, not that--you had that. Too funny. His favorite items from his birthday-his police car power wheels and his cowboy boots. He is also pretty darn cute in his police uniform. He makes you call him policeman and says he is protecting you. He was wearing his outfit in a store the other day and someone asked him his name. He said--policeman.
Things to celebrate--my sister in law and brother in law adopted a baby boy (gabe) from the states--he is beautiful and they made it home in time for the party!! He is such a lucky boy-he has some of the best people as parents (funny, love the lord, etc...)--his parents adore him and I'm in love as well. My family is just as lucky to have all of them, too.
I have been a little panicked the last month or so because Vasa had lost a pound. Josh and I went on a wild frenzy where most things revolved around how many calories (healthy ones) we could get him to consume. I am pleased to say that he gained 3 pounds at his last doctor's appointment. They were able to finally put him on a pill for his latent tb since his weight was up--it was much easier to crush and put in a spoonful of pudding than getting him to choke down the 3 teaspoons of syrup that he didn't like. We think we have only 5 more months on the medication Yahoo!!
Vasa had preschool, part 2 again last week. Started off the week by continuing to walk out of the classroom or into the bathroom whenever he pleased. After a few days, I am proud to say that today the only problem they had is that he didn't want to line up after playground time. One threat of calling his mother and he lined up!! I am still grinning ear to ear. He is just going a few mornings a week, so it gives him some time to make friends and learn some things, yet we still get our time together. Loving the fact that he wants me to hold him often, gives me kisses, asked me to hold his hand, etc.. Think those are good signs of attachment.
Wednesday, Vasa will have surgery on his eye. He has an eye that turns out-strabismus-doesn't happen all of the time but enough that they said it needs to be fixed surgically. He also has something called double elevator palsy--love the name. It basically means one of his eyes won't look up. Feel like the bad mom that the doctor had to point it out to me before I noticed. Sigh. This they won't fix, though. They said it shouldn't affect his vision and will be less noticeable the taller he gets. Hoping all goes as planned and praying that he won't need another surgery any time soon. Feeling so sorry for him that he will be poked and prodded again. But, it will be nice to have both eyes looking at me and not having to think about which eye I should be focused on. I'm thankful it will be fixed before he begins to get teased for it or his vision becomes affected.
We are struggling with a few things, but are common things, I think, for some preschoolers. I have two children who can get "the look" from us and they straighten up right away. I now have two children (including Vasa) that don't get or don't care about the look. They are a little more difficult at times to parent and require you to be on your game--that parenting game. I have to say, though, that I am so thankful to have been actively parenting a child like this before Vasa came. This type of child can be so funny and keep things interesting at all times, but you have to be creative and on top of things--sometimes even foreseeing challenges before they happen. Example--a full bottle of shampoo for these children may scream, wow! I could make a bunch of bubbles if I dumped this entire bottle in the water! It doesn't automatically click to use just a little because mom will hit the roof if the whole bottle is empty when she enters the bathroom. They see the fun involved the the bubbles as trumping the getting in trouble part, I think. Being a rule follower myself (on most rules that I deem important), it makes no sense to me that this wouldn't occur to everyone. Yet, it doesn't. My absolute favorite book that I need to read again is a book called, I believe, You Can't Make Me! It is a wonderful book that gives such practical, useful information--useable information when you are feeling like your children are outsmarting you. It makes you feel like the parent again and less like "herding cats." Vasa still has the I don't want tos--he is still learning the drill where even if you don't want to, you have to b/c mommy and daddy said. It is sweet, though, to hear him say, Mommy helps me. Daddy keeps me safe, Mommy and Daddy take care of me... M and D love me. Kind of reassurance for him that these are good things and, yes, that it is ok to love and trust us.
Other thing that I still see is a struggle is that the boy still has something I had read about common with adoptive kids. He has a gas petal but doesn't seem to have a brake petal when he gets tired. He gets "the crazies" when he is tired, having little self control. You have to remove him or pick him up/keep him still and almost let him regroup. Each month, it seems less frequent. Funny thing--he hates naptime and often refuses to get still. Mean mommy makes him get still before he is allowed to get out of the bed--just 5 minutes and you can get up. Enough time to rest and regroup--even just for a few short minutes. The funny part is within seconds of getting still he falls asleep. Probably another reason that he refuses to get still. He knows he will fall asleep and as he says, "I don't want to" don't is pronounced dow-n and won't-woan't. Sweet thing. His English is sounding so southern that it is probably a bad reflection on us.
Have to brag on my husband a bit before I wrap it up. I have the world's greatest husband. I went to San Diego with my mom and sister over the weekend and he held the fort down wonderfully. First off, he told me to spend money on myself--not many husbands that say that. He helped pack my suitcase, slipping in some notes that I found while unpacking--such sweet notes like I miss you already and such. He said the weekend went well--no calls from him with a stressful tone. He didn't feel the need to clean up my "mess" while I was gone--he didn't even put up the folded clothes on my dining room table--such a feat for him, b/c he doesn't like clutters and messes--cute thing walks in some days and starts putting stuff away--forgetting to say hello (well, maybe not quite that bad). He allowed himself to enjoy the kids and just take care of them. When I got home, all of the kids handed me flowers at the airport. Came home and he had baked a cake and made home made ice cream. What a guy! When I got home from the zoo in San Diego, I took my shoe off and it had a note in the bottom of it-funny missed that one before. He is also the best at cheering anyone up. Ava was down about something the other day and Josh pretended he was showing her a new karate weapon-the chinese woop up on you or something and started swinging Ava's karate belt around her making karate noises--she instantly lit up--too bad he whopped her in the face with the chinese woop up on accident, leaving a red streak on the side of her face. She didn't seem to mind at all. She still had a big smile on her face when I told her to be sure to tell her teacher tomorrow if the mark was still there the next day, please tell your teacher, "yes, my dad hit me, but no, it wasn't like that--just demonstrating the chinese woop up weapon and got carried away." He is such a charmer--but so loving in so many ways--in not only his words but his actions as well. I love you, Josh, and I am so thankful you are my best friend and husband.
Things to celebrate--my sister in law and brother in law adopted a baby boy (gabe) from the states--he is beautiful and they made it home in time for the party!! He is such a lucky boy-he has some of the best people as parents (funny, love the lord, etc...)--his parents adore him and I'm in love as well. My family is just as lucky to have all of them, too.
I have been a little panicked the last month or so because Vasa had lost a pound. Josh and I went on a wild frenzy where most things revolved around how many calories (healthy ones) we could get him to consume. I am pleased to say that he gained 3 pounds at his last doctor's appointment. They were able to finally put him on a pill for his latent tb since his weight was up--it was much easier to crush and put in a spoonful of pudding than getting him to choke down the 3 teaspoons of syrup that he didn't like. We think we have only 5 more months on the medication Yahoo!!
Vasa had preschool, part 2 again last week. Started off the week by continuing to walk out of the classroom or into the bathroom whenever he pleased. After a few days, I am proud to say that today the only problem they had is that he didn't want to line up after playground time. One threat of calling his mother and he lined up!! I am still grinning ear to ear. He is just going a few mornings a week, so it gives him some time to make friends and learn some things, yet we still get our time together. Loving the fact that he wants me to hold him often, gives me kisses, asked me to hold his hand, etc.. Think those are good signs of attachment.
Wednesday, Vasa will have surgery on his eye. He has an eye that turns out-strabismus-doesn't happen all of the time but enough that they said it needs to be fixed surgically. He also has something called double elevator palsy--love the name. It basically means one of his eyes won't look up. Feel like the bad mom that the doctor had to point it out to me before I noticed. Sigh. This they won't fix, though. They said it shouldn't affect his vision and will be less noticeable the taller he gets. Hoping all goes as planned and praying that he won't need another surgery any time soon. Feeling so sorry for him that he will be poked and prodded again. But, it will be nice to have both eyes looking at me and not having to think about which eye I should be focused on. I'm thankful it will be fixed before he begins to get teased for it or his vision becomes affected.
We are struggling with a few things, but are common things, I think, for some preschoolers. I have two children who can get "the look" from us and they straighten up right away. I now have two children (including Vasa) that don't get or don't care about the look. They are a little more difficult at times to parent and require you to be on your game--that parenting game. I have to say, though, that I am so thankful to have been actively parenting a child like this before Vasa came. This type of child can be so funny and keep things interesting at all times, but you have to be creative and on top of things--sometimes even foreseeing challenges before they happen. Example--a full bottle of shampoo for these children may scream, wow! I could make a bunch of bubbles if I dumped this entire bottle in the water! It doesn't automatically click to use just a little because mom will hit the roof if the whole bottle is empty when she enters the bathroom. They see the fun involved the the bubbles as trumping the getting in trouble part, I think. Being a rule follower myself (on most rules that I deem important), it makes no sense to me that this wouldn't occur to everyone. Yet, it doesn't. My absolute favorite book that I need to read again is a book called, I believe, You Can't Make Me! It is a wonderful book that gives such practical, useful information--useable information when you are feeling like your children are outsmarting you. It makes you feel like the parent again and less like "herding cats." Vasa still has the I don't want tos--he is still learning the drill where even if you don't want to, you have to b/c mommy and daddy said. It is sweet, though, to hear him say, Mommy helps me. Daddy keeps me safe, Mommy and Daddy take care of me... M and D love me. Kind of reassurance for him that these are good things and, yes, that it is ok to love and trust us.
Other thing that I still see is a struggle is that the boy still has something I had read about common with adoptive kids. He has a gas petal but doesn't seem to have a brake petal when he gets tired. He gets "the crazies" when he is tired, having little self control. You have to remove him or pick him up/keep him still and almost let him regroup. Each month, it seems less frequent. Funny thing--he hates naptime and often refuses to get still. Mean mommy makes him get still before he is allowed to get out of the bed--just 5 minutes and you can get up. Enough time to rest and regroup--even just for a few short minutes. The funny part is within seconds of getting still he falls asleep. Probably another reason that he refuses to get still. He knows he will fall asleep and as he says, "I don't want to" don't is pronounced dow-n and won't-woan't. Sweet thing. His English is sounding so southern that it is probably a bad reflection on us.
Have to brag on my husband a bit before I wrap it up. I have the world's greatest husband. I went to San Diego with my mom and sister over the weekend and he held the fort down wonderfully. First off, he told me to spend money on myself--not many husbands that say that. He helped pack my suitcase, slipping in some notes that I found while unpacking--such sweet notes like I miss you already and such. He said the weekend went well--no calls from him with a stressful tone. He didn't feel the need to clean up my "mess" while I was gone--he didn't even put up the folded clothes on my dining room table--such a feat for him, b/c he doesn't like clutters and messes--cute thing walks in some days and starts putting stuff away--forgetting to say hello (well, maybe not quite that bad). He allowed himself to enjoy the kids and just take care of them. When I got home, all of the kids handed me flowers at the airport. Came home and he had baked a cake and made home made ice cream. What a guy! When I got home from the zoo in San Diego, I took my shoe off and it had a note in the bottom of it-funny missed that one before. He is also the best at cheering anyone up. Ava was down about something the other day and Josh pretended he was showing her a new karate weapon-the chinese woop up on you or something and started swinging Ava's karate belt around her making karate noises--she instantly lit up--too bad he whopped her in the face with the chinese woop up on accident, leaving a red streak on the side of her face. She didn't seem to mind at all. She still had a big smile on her face when I told her to be sure to tell her teacher tomorrow if the mark was still there the next day, please tell your teacher, "yes, my dad hit me, but no, it wasn't like that--just demonstrating the chinese woop up weapon and got carried away." He is such a charmer--but so loving in so many ways--in not only his words but his actions as well. I love you, Josh, and I am so thankful you are my best friend and husband.
Friday, December 30, 2011
What a Christmas!
We have had such an amazing year in 2011! Our girls are growing up to be sweet little ladies, like their precious Mom, and we have my little man with us too. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving and Christmas. Gathering with our extended families was a real joy this Holiday season as we were able to introduce sweet Vasa to everyone. He did well meeting and playing with his cousins, Aunts and Uncles.
Christmas was a new treat for Vasa too. He adapted pretty quickly to the process. He would wake up each morning with the girls and hunt for Alvason, our Elf, he loved looking for Baby Jesus everywhere and for Santa. We met with Claire's god family and he was shocked to see that Santa, better known to us as Uncle Dennis. Vasa jumped to be held by Uncle Dennis and repeatedly told everyone that he was Santa. Uncle Dennis has a longer white beard so he fits the bill.
As Christmas day approached Vasa and the girls helped Claire bake cookies, cakes and other fun Holiday treats. He was happy to sit on the counter and lick spoons and beaters. He is a natural, just like my girls, when it comes to baking and eating the leftovers. I think all the kids were happy with their gifts from Santa and from all the family. As usual, it was a bit over the top because we are lucky to have such great relationships with our extended family and everyone is so giving. We were able to enjoy time with my family at my Mom's house and with Claire's family at Gigi's river place.
DD and Vasa both received glider bikes from Santa and DD rode her bike through the house almost all day. Unfortunately, it was raining so she was regulated to the house with her riding but it didn't slow her down at all. Allie got a poor man's Smart Board, or a Udraw for the Wii, and she spent several hours drawing and playing her game that came along too. Ava received a ditigal camera and took nearly 50 pictures documenting all that happened on Christmas day. She also took pictures of Claire's decorations which will help for next year when it comes time to put it all out again. Vasa played on his bike but complained that it was broken because he couldn't understand that he had to balance the bike on his own. He is used to riding his two firetrucks and car which have four wheels so it was a bit of a challenge but after watching his professional sister DD he is getting the hang of it.
Our Christmas with my family and Claire's yielded great gifts as well. Clothes, toys, projects and loud trucks all came home from our time together. I think most of our loot has found a home in each bedroom and everyone seems to be delighted. Gigi took the girls shopping on Wednesday of this week to spend their gift cards and just like her Aunt Jill, Ava Kate, stayed out nearly all day looking for just the right pair of shoes...maybe even more than one!
As I reflect on 2011, I am amazed by the changes we have seen in our family. Our Father is so gracious to continue to bless us with health and togetherness. Claire's amazing Dad continues to get great results from his post cancer reviews, Claire's sister, Jill and her husband JD are well, their boys continue to grow strong and more incredibly smart each day, Gigi is happy to share her free time loving on her six grandchildren taking them out to eat and to the movies, my folks are happy and enjoying retirement - mom cares for her mother, plays with our kids and gets to finally have down time to read and rest while Dad does whatever needs to be done for others and sings with his group of old guys, Jay and Kaci are settling into their search for the perfect child via adoption and we pray with them through that journey.
Of all the changes that have been apart of our 2011, I continue to thank my heavenly Father for the peace that is my wife! She is such a solid and anchoring part of me. I have never known a more loving, caring, sweet hearted person than Claire. For almost 18 years now this brilliant and beautiful girl has been an incredible gift to me. She is an amazing example of Christ in my everday. It is because of her heart for Him that we have been afforded our little Vasa. She listened, even in the face of my concerns, to her heart as Father led her toward adoption.
As a Dad, I am trusting that Father will continue to expand my heart and lead me to be the man he created for my four children and for my wife. He has shown me what it is to love outside myself. While this is against my flesh - which strives for everything selfish - Father keeps reminding me that I am not my own and that His plans are always perfect!
My girls and Vasa are incredible gifts to me that I am becoming more and more in love with each day. Claire and I have discussed the tension that is very real between our selfish nature and the progressive nature of Christ which is slowing rooting deeper in our hearts. It is from this Christ like nature that I pray I live each day. It is from this ever expanding heart that I love my children and seek Father's heart for them.
I am a blessed man! Christmas this year has been like no other and I hope and pray that 2012 brings Claire and I deeper into His heart! Thank you for those who have been in prayer for us during our exciting & wild 2011 and through the past 6 months as Vasa has grafted into our family! We could never express how vital your prayers have been for us. I am the proud Papa of four incredible children and the luckiest man alive to have Claire as my wife and best friend! Love to you all!
Christmas was a new treat for Vasa too. He adapted pretty quickly to the process. He would wake up each morning with the girls and hunt for Alvason, our Elf, he loved looking for Baby Jesus everywhere and for Santa. We met with Claire's god family and he was shocked to see that Santa, better known to us as Uncle Dennis. Vasa jumped to be held by Uncle Dennis and repeatedly told everyone that he was Santa. Uncle Dennis has a longer white beard so he fits the bill.
As Christmas day approached Vasa and the girls helped Claire bake cookies, cakes and other fun Holiday treats. He was happy to sit on the counter and lick spoons and beaters. He is a natural, just like my girls, when it comes to baking and eating the leftovers. I think all the kids were happy with their gifts from Santa and from all the family. As usual, it was a bit over the top because we are lucky to have such great relationships with our extended family and everyone is so giving. We were able to enjoy time with my family at my Mom's house and with Claire's family at Gigi's river place.
DD and Vasa both received glider bikes from Santa and DD rode her bike through the house almost all day. Unfortunately, it was raining so she was regulated to the house with her riding but it didn't slow her down at all. Allie got a poor man's Smart Board, or a Udraw for the Wii, and she spent several hours drawing and playing her game that came along too. Ava received a ditigal camera and took nearly 50 pictures documenting all that happened on Christmas day. She also took pictures of Claire's decorations which will help for next year when it comes time to put it all out again. Vasa played on his bike but complained that it was broken because he couldn't understand that he had to balance the bike on his own. He is used to riding his two firetrucks and car which have four wheels so it was a bit of a challenge but after watching his professional sister DD he is getting the hang of it.
Our Christmas with my family and Claire's yielded great gifts as well. Clothes, toys, projects and loud trucks all came home from our time together. I think most of our loot has found a home in each bedroom and everyone seems to be delighted. Gigi took the girls shopping on Wednesday of this week to spend their gift cards and just like her Aunt Jill, Ava Kate, stayed out nearly all day looking for just the right pair of shoes...maybe even more than one!
As I reflect on 2011, I am amazed by the changes we have seen in our family. Our Father is so gracious to continue to bless us with health and togetherness. Claire's amazing Dad continues to get great results from his post cancer reviews, Claire's sister, Jill and her husband JD are well, their boys continue to grow strong and more incredibly smart each day, Gigi is happy to share her free time loving on her six grandchildren taking them out to eat and to the movies, my folks are happy and enjoying retirement - mom cares for her mother, plays with our kids and gets to finally have down time to read and rest while Dad does whatever needs to be done for others and sings with his group of old guys, Jay and Kaci are settling into their search for the perfect child via adoption and we pray with them through that journey.
Of all the changes that have been apart of our 2011, I continue to thank my heavenly Father for the peace that is my wife! She is such a solid and anchoring part of me. I have never known a more loving, caring, sweet hearted person than Claire. For almost 18 years now this brilliant and beautiful girl has been an incredible gift to me. She is an amazing example of Christ in my everday. It is because of her heart for Him that we have been afforded our little Vasa. She listened, even in the face of my concerns, to her heart as Father led her toward adoption.
As a Dad, I am trusting that Father will continue to expand my heart and lead me to be the man he created for my four children and for my wife. He has shown me what it is to love outside myself. While this is against my flesh - which strives for everything selfish - Father keeps reminding me that I am not my own and that His plans are always perfect!
My girls and Vasa are incredible gifts to me that I am becoming more and more in love with each day. Claire and I have discussed the tension that is very real between our selfish nature and the progressive nature of Christ which is slowing rooting deeper in our hearts. It is from this Christ like nature that I pray I live each day. It is from this ever expanding heart that I love my children and seek Father's heart for them.
I am a blessed man! Christmas this year has been like no other and I hope and pray that 2012 brings Claire and I deeper into His heart! Thank you for those who have been in prayer for us during our exciting & wild 2011 and through the past 6 months as Vasa has grafted into our family! We could never express how vital your prayers have been for us. I am the proud Papa of four incredible children and the luckiest man alive to have Claire as my wife and best friend! Love to you all!
Saturday, December 10, 2011
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Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Vasa-here with us over 5 months!
Hard to believe how many changes that Vasa has made in such a short amount of time. I've put off the update mainly because of lack of time (4 kids and it is getting near christmas) and I don't feel like an great writer, so I'm afraid that things will come out the wrong way. But, I'll try my best. First of all, I can't say enough how proud I have been of my other children. They are so incredibly sweet to Vasa and more patient with him than I am the majority of the time. They include him, mother him, teach him, love on him, etc.. --it has just been a testimony to watch. Vasa is incredibly loving and sweet to them, too-not to mention how cute he is--makes it a little easier.
Each day, Vasa's English is improving. It is so funny to see what things will come out of his mouth. He is so outgoing, too, so it has been a change for me--my girls are much more reserved in public places. He continues to speak to someone until he gets their attention. "Hey man! Whatcha doin? How are you?" It is usually fine until he says hey man to a woman. I keep trying to tell him, you can be friendly, but just say hey-not hey man, hey woman. At first, I was afraid this was a bad attachment sign. But, he is just outgoing and friendly I think. He never stops talking and needs updates on everyone's status at all times. He just asked me, "What's Granny doing?" We haven't seen her since before Thanksgiving, so I'm glad my 3 year old is reminding me we need to pay her a visit.
I'm having to get used to boys. I think a lot of the things he does, people say--that's a boy. An example--he still likes to play dog. Yet, now it doesn't bother me--it's not an activity for attention or coping, it is just something he does when he is bored. He was quiet, so I walked in the dining room to see what "my son the dog" was doing. He had a chewed up straw in his mouth. One of my dogs had found it and chewed it up. He had it in his mouth. I said, "Vasa! We keep telling you we don't put things in our mouth!" He says, "Vasa a dog! Sparkle (our dog) do dat!" Like-lady, you know this! But, I have to give the speech about germs and choking.
It has been very sweet to hear him say now in the past month, mama loves me, daddy loves me, etc.. and anyone else that comes to mind. He now willingly gives kisses and asks to sit in my lap--the lap thing doesn't last long, b/c he doesn't like to sit still, but it is still sweet. I was happy to see him turn away hugs and being picked up when meeting some new friends and family members--thought that was a good sign.
He tested positive for tuberculosis-latent not active (lungs are clear and not contagious), but he is now on a medication he will take for 9 months. It is a liquid and he hates taking it. I don't think it tastes that bad, but he has to drink a good bit of it and he gets sick on the toilet about 2 hours later. Last night, we have tried giving it to him at bedtime and we are hoping it helps. We tried to switch him to the pill--heard it was a little easier with less side effects, but he doesn't weigh enough for the mg tablet--he has to gain 2 pounds to take half. As far as the upset tummy, food helps a little and the doctor basically said--sorry about that! I've been trying my best to fatten him up, but it's hard when he is sick to his stomach and is probably not absorbing the calories. Keeping my fingers crossed that the night thing will work. At his check up, though, we were pleased that he is now in the 8th percentile for height and the 10th for weight. He is still a pretty good eater. Loves, loves fruit--hard to put on two pounds, though, with fruit.
He is going to speech once a week--not sure the 30 minutes is helping greatly, but it gives me at least an idea of what he doesn't know. We are trying to use more pronouns and positional words now and colors. I'm having a harder time at speech than he is, b/c it drives me crazy to hear her ask him a question that I know he knows the answer, but he answers quickly without listening or thinking. Like-"Do you eat a policeman--while pointing to him--Vasa answers, yes!" I think he might start school after Christmas, but my first choice in schools doesn't have an opening. Little bummed--he just is getting a little bored if I am not pulling activities out for him all the time, etc.. I am so glad he is soaking it all up and wants to play with mommy all day, but it is hard to fold laundry and cook a meal with Vasa begging for mommy to play. Trying to not let all of those household chores overwhelm me, but it is hard. I have tried to be disciplined and even have some sit down time for school--it has been good practice and he loves any activity -for the most part-that we do. Today he sat down and wrote some letters on his own--one was actually an A and one was an S-couldn't believe it.
Still working on what I think is an adoption thing--sit down if you get tired, read a book, etc.. He gets wild and crazy eyed and we either take a nap or have a quiet break in the dark with me holding him--think he has stimulation overload at that point. In the beginning, though, I thought it was happening all of the time. Now it is getting better. Always trying to guess--what is an adoption thing, a boy thing, a three year old thing, or personality thing. He likes to be in charge and call all of the shots. I probably don't let him call as many shots as I should--but trying desperately to make sure he knows who is in charge. His latest when he doesn't want to do something is "Mommy-don't!!" I even heard a ne kasool (russian for I didn't say) yesterday--I hadn't heard that one in a while. I really haven't heard any Russian in a while. Kind of sad, because I wished that we had known an affective way to help him adapt, bond, and keep his Russian somehow. Hopefully, he can maybe pick it back up in the future. So pleased that he is communicating so well, though.
He now tells us when he has to potty-hooray--and even goes most of the time at the house on his own. He loves to sing (and talk). His favorite song is still twinkle twinkle little star, but he sings many others now. It was very sweet after church Sunday to hear him spontaneously sing Happy Birthday to Jesus. I had not taught him that-his sunday school teacher had. Very sweet--he also tells me often, "Jesus loves me." Makes me teary. Jesus loved him enough to unite us as a family--we are so blessed.
Each day, Vasa's English is improving. It is so funny to see what things will come out of his mouth. He is so outgoing, too, so it has been a change for me--my girls are much more reserved in public places. He continues to speak to someone until he gets their attention. "Hey man! Whatcha doin? How are you?" It is usually fine until he says hey man to a woman. I keep trying to tell him, you can be friendly, but just say hey-not hey man, hey woman. At first, I was afraid this was a bad attachment sign. But, he is just outgoing and friendly I think. He never stops talking and needs updates on everyone's status at all times. He just asked me, "What's Granny doing?" We haven't seen her since before Thanksgiving, so I'm glad my 3 year old is reminding me we need to pay her a visit.
I'm having to get used to boys. I think a lot of the things he does, people say--that's a boy. An example--he still likes to play dog. Yet, now it doesn't bother me--it's not an activity for attention or coping, it is just something he does when he is bored. He was quiet, so I walked in the dining room to see what "my son the dog" was doing. He had a chewed up straw in his mouth. One of my dogs had found it and chewed it up. He had it in his mouth. I said, "Vasa! We keep telling you we don't put things in our mouth!" He says, "Vasa a dog! Sparkle (our dog) do dat!" Like-lady, you know this! But, I have to give the speech about germs and choking.
It has been very sweet to hear him say now in the past month, mama loves me, daddy loves me, etc.. and anyone else that comes to mind. He now willingly gives kisses and asks to sit in my lap--the lap thing doesn't last long, b/c he doesn't like to sit still, but it is still sweet. I was happy to see him turn away hugs and being picked up when meeting some new friends and family members--thought that was a good sign.
He tested positive for tuberculosis-latent not active (lungs are clear and not contagious), but he is now on a medication he will take for 9 months. It is a liquid and he hates taking it. I don't think it tastes that bad, but he has to drink a good bit of it and he gets sick on the toilet about 2 hours later. Last night, we have tried giving it to him at bedtime and we are hoping it helps. We tried to switch him to the pill--heard it was a little easier with less side effects, but he doesn't weigh enough for the mg tablet--he has to gain 2 pounds to take half. As far as the upset tummy, food helps a little and the doctor basically said--sorry about that! I've been trying my best to fatten him up, but it's hard when he is sick to his stomach and is probably not absorbing the calories. Keeping my fingers crossed that the night thing will work. At his check up, though, we were pleased that he is now in the 8th percentile for height and the 10th for weight. He is still a pretty good eater. Loves, loves fruit--hard to put on two pounds, though, with fruit.
He is going to speech once a week--not sure the 30 minutes is helping greatly, but it gives me at least an idea of what he doesn't know. We are trying to use more pronouns and positional words now and colors. I'm having a harder time at speech than he is, b/c it drives me crazy to hear her ask him a question that I know he knows the answer, but he answers quickly without listening or thinking. Like-"Do you eat a policeman--while pointing to him--Vasa answers, yes!" I think he might start school after Christmas, but my first choice in schools doesn't have an opening. Little bummed--he just is getting a little bored if I am not pulling activities out for him all the time, etc.. I am so glad he is soaking it all up and wants to play with mommy all day, but it is hard to fold laundry and cook a meal with Vasa begging for mommy to play. Trying to not let all of those household chores overwhelm me, but it is hard. I have tried to be disciplined and even have some sit down time for school--it has been good practice and he loves any activity -for the most part-that we do. Today he sat down and wrote some letters on his own--one was actually an A and one was an S-couldn't believe it.
Still working on what I think is an adoption thing--sit down if you get tired, read a book, etc.. He gets wild and crazy eyed and we either take a nap or have a quiet break in the dark with me holding him--think he has stimulation overload at that point. In the beginning, though, I thought it was happening all of the time. Now it is getting better. Always trying to guess--what is an adoption thing, a boy thing, a three year old thing, or personality thing. He likes to be in charge and call all of the shots. I probably don't let him call as many shots as I should--but trying desperately to make sure he knows who is in charge. His latest when he doesn't want to do something is "Mommy-don't!!" I even heard a ne kasool (russian for I didn't say) yesterday--I hadn't heard that one in a while. I really haven't heard any Russian in a while. Kind of sad, because I wished that we had known an affective way to help him adapt, bond, and keep his Russian somehow. Hopefully, he can maybe pick it back up in the future. So pleased that he is communicating so well, though.
He now tells us when he has to potty-hooray--and even goes most of the time at the house on his own. He loves to sing (and talk). His favorite song is still twinkle twinkle little star, but he sings many others now. It was very sweet after church Sunday to hear him spontaneously sing Happy Birthday to Jesus. I had not taught him that-his sunday school teacher had. Very sweet--he also tells me often, "Jesus loves me." Makes me teary. Jesus loved him enough to unite us as a family--we are so blessed.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
quick post update
My battery is going to die soon on the computer, but I had a few minutes to myself and wanted to make a quick post. Vasa is doing great! I can't believe how much he is talking. Each day, he surprises me with a new phrase. Yesterday, for example, my mom walked off at stein mart and he said, "Gigi, come back!" Other times, I shake my head with a little frustration--he is not the best listener. I still struggle with him not paying attention--thinking he would learn so much more if he would tune in a little. Yesterday, somebody asked him if he had any dogs and he said no--then when asked what their names were, he said Joshua Vasa. Uggh! Listen, I wanted to shake him--you know this. Yes, you have 2 dogs that you love, and yes, you know their names--you talk about them constantly.
He is still home with me--trying to practice things he needs to know for school--tell me when you need to go potty, ask me when you want to go outside, when we are doing something-don't just walk off when you get disinterested. He is going to my gym once a week and the library, so I feel like that is helping him practice listening, sitting still, and following instructions. Also a blessing--I was a little discouraged when we went to have him evaluated for speech--actually pleased with how he did, but kicking myself for feeling like I had him tested too early. I felt like it wasn't a fair evaluation b/c of the 2nd language thing--comparing him to someone whose 1st language is english. Also, a little discouraged when they told me that insurance would not cover it and it would be 90 dollars a week. Wasn't sure he really needed it, so I said no, we'll wait. I kept second guessing myself--maybe I'm not doing enough--but got a call back a few weeks later that our insurance would cover most of it. Great!! We went for our first appointment this week. I was pleased that he did well, but continued to feel like I went into the wrong profession--30 minute session where they played with toys and got him to talk about them--90 bucks a pop--I should have done that--any child could probably be tolerated for 30 minutes :).
He continues to have new experiences each day--love seeing the joy on his face. Today, he got to ride on a toy train at my gym--he thought it was the best!! Can't wait to see his face at halloween when people just give him candy for opening his bag. He's going to love that. One last thing. Went to hobby lobby--showed him santa and the christmas trees. Not sure if he knows who santa is and why he is a big deal. His response was, "oh barney?" ooh is where for him--sweet thing--maybe we can say barney brought his toys this year. Still doesn't watch more that 5 minutes of a show before he is finished--mean mommy makes him sit there, though for one show on occasion.
Favorite word--ah uh--went from ni kasul to no to ah uh. Trying to get him to understand you don't say no to mommy and daddy. He likes to be in charge.
He is still home with me--trying to practice things he needs to know for school--tell me when you need to go potty, ask me when you want to go outside, when we are doing something-don't just walk off when you get disinterested. He is going to my gym once a week and the library, so I feel like that is helping him practice listening, sitting still, and following instructions. Also a blessing--I was a little discouraged when we went to have him evaluated for speech--actually pleased with how he did, but kicking myself for feeling like I had him tested too early. I felt like it wasn't a fair evaluation b/c of the 2nd language thing--comparing him to someone whose 1st language is english. Also, a little discouraged when they told me that insurance would not cover it and it would be 90 dollars a week. Wasn't sure he really needed it, so I said no, we'll wait. I kept second guessing myself--maybe I'm not doing enough--but got a call back a few weeks later that our insurance would cover most of it. Great!! We went for our first appointment this week. I was pleased that he did well, but continued to feel like I went into the wrong profession--30 minute session where they played with toys and got him to talk about them--90 bucks a pop--I should have done that--any child could probably be tolerated for 30 minutes :).
He continues to have new experiences each day--love seeing the joy on his face. Today, he got to ride on a toy train at my gym--he thought it was the best!! Can't wait to see his face at halloween when people just give him candy for opening his bag. He's going to love that. One last thing. Went to hobby lobby--showed him santa and the christmas trees. Not sure if he knows who santa is and why he is a big deal. His response was, "oh barney?" ooh is where for him--sweet thing--maybe we can say barney brought his toys this year. Still doesn't watch more that 5 minutes of a show before he is finished--mean mommy makes him sit there, though for one show on occasion.
Favorite word--ah uh--went from ni kasul to no to ah uh. Trying to get him to understand you don't say no to mommy and daddy. He likes to be in charge.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Preschool Drop-Out
Wow-this Wednesday will mark our 3 month anniversary since we have picked up Vasa. It has gone by so fast. He is also making huge accomplishments each day. He is so precious and just has a love for life. Everything always seems so exciting to him--new things are literally jump up and down exciting. It is refreshing to see--there are so many things in life that I wish I could show uninhibitedly how excited I was like he does. His English each day is making improvements. We are hearing 3 word phrases sometimes--Vasa do it, juice is yummy... I'm going to be a little annoying by listing all of his words just to allow myself to see all of the words he know so far and to have a record of them. We think he knows around a hundred-- good morning, night night, all sisters names, mama, daddy, papa, Oscar, Sparkle, puppy, 4 grandparents names, Jill, Buddy, Jack, no, yes, eat, milk, juice, water, cup, hot, school, work, coffee, yucky, oh no, peek a boo, uh oh, beach, pool, washing machine, spin spin, dump truck, bus, car, open, big, tv, ouch, boo boo, flush, several potty words and anatomically correct phrases, hands, wash, tummy, teeth, hair, bear, apple, banana, cracker, cookie, door, walk, up, be nice, calm down, bicycle, man, woman, girl, boy, baby, doctor, guitar, monkey, march, e i e i o, round and round, outside, I love u, sure others but pretty good list. We saw a speech pathologist and should be starting soon. Pretty good start, though.
On to preschool--I was planning on starting him after christmas, but decided after talking to the preschool director that maybe starting now wouldn't hurt. It's just 3 days a week and they are all learning routines and such now. Well, Josh and I really didn't think he was ready, but thought we'd try. I stayed the majority of the day. It was kind of a tough first day, because he struggles a little with new environments and feeling the need to explore each nook and cranny in each. We had a new classroom, new playground, new chapel, new music room, new classroom bathroom. He did ok--he didn't want to sit still at appropriate times, but for the most part, he was ok. He was having to learn to sit, learn to walk in a line, learn to sit at the table, learn to line up at proper times, etc... but he was doing ok. Had a blip when he used the bathroom across the hall and instead of coming back to his room, he went to the next room and started eating their food. Kind of funny but hate he is still looking for his next meal--hoping that will end soon. I left for about 30 minutes to get something to eat and to see how he would do without me there. During the 30 minutes, he ran out of the classroom and down the hall (one rule we hadn't covered--you have to stay in the classroom :)), he dumped out a bucket of blocks and kicked them all around the room while laughing--what fun, and decided he was finished with his shoes--oh knows the word finished--and took them off. I think it all flustered the teacher-totally understand-and they recommended moving him to the 2 year old class. I felt like that wasn't the right move for him. I want him to learn to speak well, how to properly behave, and continue using the potty, so I was afraid that it wasn't worth his time and the precious teacher's energy right now. Also, I was afraid he was being too stimulated at school. There are so many little things at the house we are still trying to tackle. Look at someone when they are speaking to you. Sometimes you have to sit still. Even though something looks like food or smells like food, it may not be food. People need personal space--they are strangers--they may not want you to touch them. You have to ask before you use something that is not yours. Funny example this morning. He loves all of his sisters' lip balms. They leave them laying around and I remind him each time he is using them--please ask first before you use it--it is not yours. Today he grabbed what he thought was lip balm and applied it to his lips--a bunch--it was a glue stick that was left out. I feel like some of it are attachment issues anyway that are surely best handled at home. We started a class at my gym which he loves, so I'm hoping that will be a fun outing with kids his own age. Maybe after Christmas we'll rethink pre-k.
On to preschool--I was planning on starting him after christmas, but decided after talking to the preschool director that maybe starting now wouldn't hurt. It's just 3 days a week and they are all learning routines and such now. Well, Josh and I really didn't think he was ready, but thought we'd try. I stayed the majority of the day. It was kind of a tough first day, because he struggles a little with new environments and feeling the need to explore each nook and cranny in each. We had a new classroom, new playground, new chapel, new music room, new classroom bathroom. He did ok--he didn't want to sit still at appropriate times, but for the most part, he was ok. He was having to learn to sit, learn to walk in a line, learn to sit at the table, learn to line up at proper times, etc... but he was doing ok. Had a blip when he used the bathroom across the hall and instead of coming back to his room, he went to the next room and started eating their food. Kind of funny but hate he is still looking for his next meal--hoping that will end soon. I left for about 30 minutes to get something to eat and to see how he would do without me there. During the 30 minutes, he ran out of the classroom and down the hall (one rule we hadn't covered--you have to stay in the classroom :)), he dumped out a bucket of blocks and kicked them all around the room while laughing--what fun, and decided he was finished with his shoes--oh knows the word finished--and took them off. I think it all flustered the teacher-totally understand-and they recommended moving him to the 2 year old class. I felt like that wasn't the right move for him. I want him to learn to speak well, how to properly behave, and continue using the potty, so I was afraid that it wasn't worth his time and the precious teacher's energy right now. Also, I was afraid he was being too stimulated at school. There are so many little things at the house we are still trying to tackle. Look at someone when they are speaking to you. Sometimes you have to sit still. Even though something looks like food or smells like food, it may not be food. People need personal space--they are strangers--they may not want you to touch them. You have to ask before you use something that is not yours. Funny example this morning. He loves all of his sisters' lip balms. They leave them laying around and I remind him each time he is using them--please ask first before you use it--it is not yours. Today he grabbed what he thought was lip balm and applied it to his lips--a bunch--it was a glue stick that was left out. I feel like some of it are attachment issues anyway that are surely best handled at home. We started a class at my gym which he loves, so I'm hoping that will be a fun outing with kids his own age. Maybe after Christmas we'll rethink pre-k.
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