4 year checkup

Took Vasa for his 4 year checkup.  Tried not to be discouraged about him losing a pound this month (sigh), but he has grown at least 3 inches and gained 7 pounds in the 9 months we've had him.  He was at the 10th percentile on both height and weight, so we are pleased he is on the chart.  He is now eating pretty well, but I will probably continue his carnation shakes for a little while.  The doctor said to not expect him to ever get above the 25th percentile--may have had short parents.  Poor thing got 6 shots.  He did very well--still doesn't really produce tears when he is mad or upset.  Yet, he did milk it all day long.  I just ordered a "baby sling" that can carry toddlers on your back up to 60 pounds.  I was wishing two days ago, after his shots, I had the sling.  He told me that his legs were shot and he couldn't walk--all day.  I toted him from here to there.  Got old, but it was nice that he wasn't running off or anything :).  He actually sat on the floor and watched me cook for about 20 minutes.  I have never seen him sit for that long and do nothing.

That night, he woke up screaming and yelling for mama (thought that was a good attachment sign) and had a 103 fever from the shots.  Always so scary when any child's fever gets that high.  It's also the first time that I think Vasa has ever had a fever with us.  We gave him Advil-that was what the lady told me was best.  Vasa said before he took the medicine-"No, medicine makes me sick!"  Poor thing, he has had so many medicines since he got here for his tb and now his shots that have bad side affects that he actually thinks that we are giving him medicine that will make him sick instead of better.  Hate that.  To make it worse, didn't think about Advil on an empty stomach and he threw up in the sink.  Now adding to his theory of medicines making you sick.  I asked Josh, "What if he has a fever seizure??" Josh slept with him the rest of the night.

The next day he was much better, but I only got him to take the tylenol by saying, "I can't send you to school unless you take your medicine."  After school, he flat refused to take more.  So, he settled for the 101 fever instead of the Advil--tried to bite my lip and not throw out too many of the "You'd feel better if you would just take it" comments.  After school, he told me an ambulance needed to pick him up because he was sick.  Thought that was pretty smart.  At bedtime, we again gave him no option.

Last cute comment--were running errands yesterday for his sister's birthday party.  He again was saying his legs wouldn't work.  He had to tell the store's workers that he got shot in the leg.  The worker responded, "The doctor should give you candy or money for each shot."  Vasa comments back, "I like money."  The lady thought it was very funny--don't we all like money when we have it.  Maybe I could use it for faster shipping on the baby sling.

Try and Make Me

Had to have that as my title.  I am reading this book (for the second time) called try and make me by Levy and O'Hanlon.  Love it--love it even more the second time around.  He talks about that kids 2-12 are motivated by achievement, friendship, or control.  Well, the book is written for parents of those that are motivated by control--I have one biological child like that and now one adopted child like that.  He may not stay that way, though--some of his may be more of a survival instinct-he is a fighter/survivor for sure.  But this book defines my 2 kids to a T and also gives so much practical, usable ways to manage their behavior. For a few years, we had a child that played us so well like a fiddle, and it was hard to know how to parent. So many books you read are full of such warm fuzzy things that just didn't work for her.  This book saved my sanity.  And, this book continues to help me now deal with a precious, grieving four year old that takes such pleasure at times in doing what he wants to do instead of what we need him to do.  But, with love, prayer, and this book, I think I will make it.  He is now taking a nap, but this book has given me back the, "I win--you are not in charge."  I think this is such a great book for adoptive parents and should be required reading!  Ha ha-too bad I don't make that call.

Can't remember where I left off last blog.  Vasa's eyes are healing nicely after his surgery.  We are working so much now on practicing the -please look at me or whomever is talking--especially now that both of his eyes can do this-Yay!!  He is finally eating and putting on weight and height now that he is on the pill for his latent tb.  Strange how just a change to pill form could make such a difference on appetite.

He has been in school now 3 days a week for a month now.  He is doing great!  He is busy and has to be reminded to sit, but I am pleased so far with how it is going.  So nice for me, too to have a little bit of time to myself to catch up and breathe.  His teacher has been so patient and so positive about his progress in the classroom.

His language is continuing to improve.  I am looking forward to him being able to give me more descriptions about his day.  I want to know what he does and who he is playing with--that kind of thing. He is not there yet.  He just tells me things like they didn't go outside and that he didn't listen--not sure which things are true and what isn't :).

Haven't heard so much any more about the -who loves me phase.  Now lately I seem to be hearing a lot about who does and doesn't have what body parts and that he likes his--apparently he likes his and thinks it is big.  He asked me if I liked it, too.  Well, my June Cleaver self just tries to say, I love all of you.  Now please put your clothes on.  I told Josh that my fear is that he will show up to school and tell his teacher that his mom loves his big ___.    I am trying to teach him that some topics may not be appropriate to talk about to people besides mommy and daddy.    Well, he is now crying and up from a very short nap, but at least he got a little one.  Must go!